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I have this desire to look at the other guys in the locker room after gym class.... Comparing your body with the other guys is a common part of growing up, and does not mean anything about whether you are gay or straight. During puberty, your body begins to change and develop both physically and sexually. As you may already know, this can be a confusing time. Many guys wonder if their body is changing the way it should. "Checking out the competition" in the locker room is an easy way to get an answer. What comparing in the locker room won't tell you is that everyone is unique. This is not like stock car racing where everybody has to use the same class of car. In life, everybody comes to the starting line with a slightly different model. Your body will change at its own pace, perhaps faster than some of the guys, perhaps slower than other guys. That's OK. Accept your body and be patient with it. Remember, it not the car that wins the race, but the driver. Good looks and a muscular body do not make you a better person. The size of your genitals doesn't determine whether you are a real man. The sound of your voice does not make you more or less of a guy. Who are you on the inside? Who are you becoming? That's what counts. Are you a person who is trusted by others, and who keeps his word? Do your friends know they can rely on you? Do you care about others? Do you stick up for those who are treated unfairly? Do you stick with a difficult job until it is done? How do you deal with your feelings -- do you ignore them or do you face them and work through hurtful things? That's what counts. Do not be envious of others' physical characteristics. Being a man is about strength of character, not about the exterior stuff that so many people think of "being a real man." Accept your body for what it is and what it is becoming. And discover who you are inside. Discover your inner strengths, your abilities and gifts, and the masculinity that you were born with. Note: if you have specific concerns about your body (pain, unusual bumps, etc.), speak to your medical doctor. |
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