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People to talk with and places to get support

If you experience same-gender attraction, or if you are still trying to figure out if you are gay or lesbian, you may be looking for two kinds of support: someone to listen to your story so that you are not carrying it alone, and someone who can provide help, clarity and resources in your journey of understanding your sexual identity. The following list includes suggestions for finding both kinds of support.

1.    Friends: It is may be difficult to talk with friends about personal issues like same-sex attraction. If, however, you have a friend you feel you can trust, you may consider talking with him or her. It's best to tell someone whom you know will honour the trust you placed in them and who will not let what you tell them affect your friendship negatively.

2.    Teachers: Some school teachers or student services staff may be helpful. Choose a teacher you feel comfortable with, who has interacted with you in a manner that makes you feel safe and heard. Look for someone who is comfortable discussing different views on this topic, and who will treat you with respect rather than pushing you to make decisions or choices that you do not want to make.

3.    Counselors: Counselors and therapists may have a wide range of ideas about sexual identity. You want to work with a professional who prioritizes self-determination and gives you the space you need to process.  If you have other issues that you would like to talk about, such as abuse or addiction, it may be helpful to look for a counselor that has training or specializes in that area.

4.    Leaders of religious communities: There may be some resources available to you if you attend a church or a synagogue. Some religious leaders will be helpful, listening to you and treating you with respect and kindness. Others may be unhelpful, coming down hard on you or rejecting you outright. You can also have a friend call one of the religious leaders at your church or synagogue to ask what kind of resources they know about, or to check out how they might respond if someone came and talked with them.

5.    Religious youth organizations: Faith-based organizations that work with youth in schools may be quite understanding and can refer you to other resources. If one of these organizations is not working at your particular school, you can look in the phone book's white pages for a specific organization, or in the yellow pages under "Youth Organizations".